I Gotta Pretend
by EpicStormMage
Summary: Leaf was torn. Torn between listening and wanting. Gary needs to know the truth, but his pride won't let him ask her. Together both must come out on top and face their biggest fear yet... Each other.
1. Leaf: Lipstick

Hey everybody I was listening to this song on the radio and I realized that it would make a good song fic, don't you think any way, the songs called 'lipstick' well here's the song fic, enjoy

Disclaimer: I do not own anything, pokemon, the song, and the characters

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_**I know the lipstick won't fix it  
But I've gotta put my game face on  
I wish Mascara could mask this  
Until all the tears are gone  
I've gotta paint the pain away  
Make like - I'm ok  
Pretend I don't wanna stay  
Act like this aint killing me**_

"You will break up with him"

I felt my insides shatter when I heard those words. I turned away masking the few tears threatening to fall due to my shock.

_Your tough, you can do it don't break down c'mon he can't seriously mean it, he knows how happy I am with him right?_

I then answered "N-No dad, please don't do this c'mon I love him please" I was getting desperate, anyone could tell.

_**I've tried One two three too many times  
(To walk away)  
I've heard one two THREE too many lies**_

"Honey were sorry but he's just not the person for you, he s a player, he'll end up breaking your heart" said my mother gently.

The tears suddenly turned into a sob

"but-" I started

"NO BUTS!" roared my father

I turned away, tears streaming down my face as I walked to my room slamming the door behind me.

I flopped onto my bed, tears falling freely now...

_**So I gotta pretend that I'm not gonna miss you  
I gotta pretend that this is what I wanna do  
I gotta pretend when I walk out that door  
That I don't love you anymore  
I gotta play the part act like it aint killin' me  
Gotta play the part when you try stopping me  
Hide what's written on my face  
Dig deep in the makeup case  
And cover it with Lipstick**_

**Leafs POV-Next day-**

I awoke the next morning to find that I had cried myself to sleep.

_Stupid me, always listening to my parents, being the good girl and not disobeying them_

I got ready, wearing my black skinny jeans with my green t-shirt and my green, white, and black cap over my brown hair.

_**I'm sick of looking in the mirror  
Cause my mirror sees right through  
MAC aint got enough concealer  
To hide how much I'll miss you  
I've gotta cover up my hurt  
No more – getting burnt  
I really need'a let you go  
Cause my heart can't take no more **_

I had to call my boy friend, Gary and schedule my 'breakup meeting'

_Ex I thought miserably_

I picked up the phone and called Gary, he picked up on the first ring

"Hey Gary"

"Hey leaf, how are you"

"Great, just great... Can you meet me at the waterfront cafe?"

"yeah sure... Is everything okay?" He asked, concerned

I didn't answer, I just hung up, miserably might I add

_**I've tried One two three too many times  
(To walk away)  
I've heard one two THREE too many lies**_

**Leafs POV**

When I reached the cafe and saw Gary, sitting inside I took a deep breath and walked in, sitting across from him, my cap was low, covering my eyes.

_**So I gotta pretend that I'm not gonna miss you  
I gotta pretend that this is what I wanna do  
I gotta pretend when I walk out that door  
That I don't love you anymore  
I gotta play the part act like it aint killin' me  
Gotta play the part when you try stopping me  
Hide what's written on my face  
Dig deep in the makeup case  
And cover it with Lipstick**_

"leaf, are you ok" Gary asked, just like on the phone, he was concerned, though who wouldn't be when their steady girlfriend of 2 or 3 years asked you to talk then they hung up on you when you ask if their okay?

I took a deep breath "Gary... I'm breaking up with you"

"W-What!" Gary recoiled in shock

"I'm breaking up with you," I repeated trying very hard not to cry when I stood up and turned to leave

"Leaf wait!" he placed a hand on my shoulder

"Don't go... please"

Couldn't he see he was killing me with his words?

_**It's the hardest role I'll ever have to play  
It's the hardest lie I'll ever have to make  
To look you in the eye  
And not break down and cry  
When I say goodbye**_

"I- I have to go... Good bye." I said, and with that, I walked out of the cafe tears threatening to tip fell as I ran to the place where no one knew about, not even Gary...

_**So I gotta pretend that I'm not gonna miss you  
I gotta pretend that this is what I wanna do  
I gotta pretend when I walk out that door  
That I don't love you anymore**_

_**I gotta play the part act like it aint killin' me  
Gotta play the part when you try stopping me  
Hide what's written on my face  
Dig deep in the makeup case**_

_**So I gotta pretend that I'm not gonna miss you  
I gotta pretend that this is what I wanna do  
I gotta pretend when I walk out that door  
That I don't love you anymore  
I gotta play the part act like it aint killin' me  
Gotta play the part when you try stopping me  
Hide what's written on my face  
Dig deep in the makeup case  
And cover it with Lipstick**_

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How was it, good, bad, great, horrible? Please review... should i write more? You tell me?


	2. Gary: I'll be fine

_**Hey everybody, as I promised, by Christmas, but now it's before Christmas since I didn't feel lazy and I actually felt like typing! This time the song is I'll be Fine by Stevie Hoang. Thanks to my sister, musicluva4eva for helping choose the song since I had a lot of trouble choosing from all the reviews and PM's , they all fit, just this on had a bit more of a ring to it.**_

_**Thanks to everyone who reviewed and those who sent in ideas, but don't be disappointed if I didn't use them now, I might use them later. all the songs i've used so far are on my profile page.  
**_

_**Disclaimer: i dont own pokemon or the song**_

_**I forgot to put some of the lyrics into it, so now, here it is with the added lyrics!**_

_**

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**_

_**It's better if we don't speak at all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
It's better if we don't speak at all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
At all, all, all**_

_**Now deep down inside  
You know, it cuts like a knife  
But I'm too proud to show it  
Pain in my chest (it feels)  
Like I lost my breath  
But she just doesn't know it  
So many things that I'm just dying to say  
But I can't seem to tell her**_

Gary's POV

Her words cut like a knife in my chest. I stared at the spot where leaf ran off to before quickly running after her.

"Leaf! Leaf!" I called, but she didn't seem to hear me as she ran off to, well, I didn't really know.

Leaf then stopped abruptly and I figured she had heard me but, she then released her Vaporeon.

"Surf."

I had to react quickly or I would lose her.

"Blastiose" a called him out quietly.

"Surf too, follow Vaporeon."

We went through a few winding rivers before leaf finally reached her destination. A small creek with a running water fall and cave at the edge, except this cave wasn't dark and gloomy like it should of been, no it was a shining a soft green, pulsating light almost.

she slipped into the cave with her vapeoreon following her.

_**It's killing me, to know that she wants to leave  
But I'm not gonna beg her to stay (no)  
Cause I got my pride, I'm not gonna cry (cry)  
There won't be no tears falling from these eyes  
Don't need her to see, that it's killing me  
So this is what I'll say**_

"Leaf," I whispered as I entered the cave a minute or so after her.

She jerked her head up, is it just me or was she crying?

_Im gonna go with just me, she was the one who broke up with me, unless..._

"Leaf, why did you break up with Me." my voice was quite, it echoed off the cave walls.

"I-" her voice faltered.

"I... Fell in love with someone else, I don't- I don't love you anymore" her voice cracked a bit.

I turned away, tears stung in my eyes, but I wasn't gonna cry, I new that.

_**You don't have to worry about me  
Girl, I'll be fine  
You don't have to call me again  
Girl, it's alright  
You don't have to ask me if I will be okay  
Girl, I'll be fine  
Girl, I'll be fine**_

"Ok then... You don't have to worry about me anymore" I turned away, about to leave.

"We could still be friends" her words were still small, like she expected me to yell at her.

"That's okay, you don't even have to call me again, that would probably be such a big burden right?" my words came out harsher than I intended it to.

"Are you sure you'll be okay."

_**You aint got to tell me that we can still be friends  
You aint gotta make no excuses and pretend  
Cause I'll be fine, said I'll be fine  
There's no need to call**_

"I'll be fine" I said.

"Are you su-"

"I got it ok! You don't need me anymore, I'll be fine" with that I walked out.

_**It's better if we don't speak at all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
It's better if we don't speak at all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
At all, all, all  
At all, all, all **_

_It's better if we don't speak at all, that way it won't hurt so much._

Gary's POV (again) -in his bedroom-

I stared at the ceiling of my bedroom, I can't believe I trusted her, she might of... No I wasn't gonna think that.

It hurt. A lot

**_now i cant believe, that i fell so deep_**  
**_and i let my heart so open_**  
**_now i gotta try, to keep it inside_**  
**_these words, are better left unspoken_**

I let her into my heart, she was one of the only I had ever let in, no matter what everyone said about me.

I had trusted leaf, I had-

_I had loved her_...

**_cause i still got my pride, im not gonna cry_**  
**_there wont be no tears fallling from these eyes_**  
**_dont need her to see_**  
**_that its killing me_**  
**_so this is what im saying_**

The tears returned to my eyes soon after that thought, no I wouldn't cry, I'd gone through too much just to cry it all out, if I had one thing left in me, it would be my pride.

I don't need her anymore.

**_You don't have to worry about me_**  
**_Girl, i'll be fine_**  
**_You dont have to call me again_**  
**_Girl, its alright_**  
**_You dont have to ask me if i will be okay_**  
**_Girl, i'll be fine_**  
**_Girl, i'll be fine_**

then I realized that she wasnt the weak one, it was me. I had locked myself up in a room because of her...

I'd lost my true passion to battle...  
__

_**You aint got to tell me that we can still be friends**_  
_**You aint gotta make no excuses and pretend**_  
_**Cause i'll be fine, said i'll be fine**_  
_**Theres no need to call**_

_Now I'm not a burden, she won't call, she won't worry about me_. My thoughts were harsh.

Though I'll be okay.

_Were not friends, I won't really have to talk to her since we used to travel together, we shouldn't really speak or her new boyfriend would be mad._

_** It's better if we don't speak at all, all, all**_  
_**at all, all, all**_  
_**at all, all, all**_  
**_It's better if we don't speak at all, all, all  
at all, all, all  
at all, all_**_**, all  
at all, all, all**_

_its better if we dont speak at all because it hurts too much.  
your the strong one leaf and someday ill get you back..._

It really would be bad if i saw them together or i would really cry.

_**Girl I'll be fine (said I'll be fine)  
There's no need to call  
It's better if we don't speak at all**_

"Gary" my grandfather called.

"What" I snapped, irritated.

"I think you should continue traveling the league starts soon, you seem upset though, everything ok?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine..."

**_

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How did you like it? I'm going to continue it for a few more chapters, the story will be great! Thanks to everyone who reviewed and PMed me (is that how you put it?)_**

**_Review please!_**


	3. Leaf: A Thousand Miles

**The song is A Thousand Miles by Vanessa Carlton, and readers, I'm sorry about the extremely late update. Oh! I think that I forgot to put it in the last chapter that it was actually** **LeafxGreenx3 that gave me the song idea... I'm super sorry if I didnt!**

**Edit Note: I'm just spell checking and making minor changes to this chapter, I'm going to go back and spell check the other two chapters.**

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_**"A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton**___

Leafs POV

_**Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces pass  
And I'm home bound**_

_**Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making a way  
Through the crowd**_

I pushed past the crowds of Saffron city, thinking about... well, my life in general. In the past few months, I have traveled and waited for this day, the day of the opening ceremony of the Pokemon league.

The day I would get to show everyone. That I was worthy to be a champion. I know that ill prove it to everyone out there, including all these faces around me.__

**_And I need you_**  
**_And I miss you_**  
**_And now I wonder..._**

_**If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight**_

Except him, I wouldn't be able to prove myself to him, or my dad...

Really, it was my dad's entire fault. Then again, I wouldn't even be able to be here, at the league, without him. Maybe he was right though, because after I was forced to break up with... Gary, I buried myself in training; become stronger than I ever hoped to as the result.

Gary, even though I probably was better off without him... I wanted to see him, even if he didn't spare me a glance, I just wanted to see him.

**_It's always times like these_**  
**_When I think of you_**  
**_And I wonder_**  
**_If you ever_**  
**_Think of me_**

_**'Cause everything's so wrong  
And I don't belong  
Living in your  
Precious memories**_

"Hey you!" yelled someone, a trainer by the looks of it.

I turned slightly, a hand resting on my faithful dragonite's poke ball, and called back a polite "yes?"

"I'm training for the league and I've challenged everyone in the league that's walked by here.. So let's battle!" cried the energetic trainer.

"Sure" I said smiling confidently, the way I usually do.

He grabbed a poke ball off his belt and tossed it into the air calling out a quick "Go! Aerodactyl!"

I threw my poke ball in the air too, letting out my Dragonite as I called "battle stance Dragonite!"

We used to battle a lot too, it was always a close match between Gary and I; we were never far behind the other. The winner wouldn't be known until the end, when one of us made the final move.__

**_'Cause I need you_**  
**_And I miss you_**  
**_And now I wonder..._**

Maybe it would of been different if I hadn't been the good girl, maybe the person on the other side would of been him.

"Aerodactyl! Use iron head!"

"Dragonite! Wait for my command and then use dragon rush... NOW!" I retaliated.

My opponent put on his battle face, that's what it looked like at least. He probably now realized that I wasn't just some helpless girl.

_**If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight  
**_  
I missed Gary, his smirk and his so-called battle face.

The Aerodactyl was hit by the dragon rush and dropped altitude slightly before regaining its balance.

"Rock slide!" the other trainer shouted.

Rocks of different sizes were hurled at Dragonite, hitting him before he could defend.

"Hyper beam!" yelled the other trainer.

"Use hyper beam too Dragonite!"__

**_And I, I_**  
**_Don't want to let you know_**  
**_I, I_**  
**_Drown in your memory_**  
**_I, I_**  
**_Don't want to let this go_**  
**_I, I_**  
**_Don't..._**

The two hyper beams hit each other, with me coming out as the victor.

I would hold onto Gary, I thought as a I clutched the Dragonite's empty poke ball in my hand, preparing to return him.

"Return, Dragonite" I said, "you did an awesome job"

"Ahhhh! I have to get stronger! You over there! I want a battle!" the trainer that just lost probably was a sore loser; he had moved on from me and was battling another trainer with an Umbrion.

_**Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces pass  
And I'm home bound**_

_**Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making a way  
Through the crowd**_

I continued to walk down the crowded streets again, the pokemon center was now coming into view, there were mothers who were shopping with their kids, couples spending time with each other and trainers battling.

"Leaf!" yelled a voice, a girls voice.

A girl was running up to me, bangs were covering her face, she had a Riolu nestled in her arms and her pink hair was flying behind her as she ran.

That was my... sort-of friends sister.

_**And I still need you  
And I still miss you  
And now I wonder...**_

"May I help you?" Nurse Joy asked the girl ahead of me in her sweet voice.

"One single room please" the pink haired girl spoke quietly.

_Chansey! chans!_

"Can you please heal my Pokemon too!" The pink haired girl asked Nurse Joy, holding her poke balls and her Riolu out.

"And mine too, please!" I held out my poke balls too as Nurse Joy took some, while Chansey took the rest.

Gary... I was sure I would see him here.__

**_If I could fall_**  
**_Into the sky_**  
**_Do you think time_**  
**_Would pass us by_**  
**_'Cause you know I'd walk_**  
**_A thousand miles_**  
**_If I could_**  
**_Just see you..._**

**_If I could fall_**  
**_Into the sky_**  
**_Do you think time_**  
**_Would pass me by_**  
**_'Cause you know I'd walk_**  
**_A thousand miles_**  
**_If I could_**  
**_Just see you_**  
**_If I could_**  
**_Just hold you_**  
**_Tonight_**

Because if I didn't, I might just walk a thousand miles to see him again.

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_**The link for the song is on my profile if you need it.  
**_

_**Please review!**_

_** Tell me what you think!**_


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